Me....Loving My Women.. |
Being a member of the female species comes with a lot of baggage. Such as heels that mangle toes but cannot be done without. And menses. And the fact that unlike men, wrinkles do not add character. They cause worry lines, which in turn lead to more wrinkles. The female aging process is a viscous cycle.
But there are some perks to being the weaker sex. And today I shall focus on the one perk am most grateful for; The ability to bond. Not with men or stray kittens or strangers' babies. No. The ability to bond with one another.
When women are not busy tearing each other down, or secretly analyzing shoe/ bag betterness, we are doing what we do best-saving one another. Being sisters, shopping partners, taking 3 am panic calls...
The world of women is such that we NEED each other. To binge on ice cream when the men we love walk out on us...or drown in wine when mother fate hands you a day that more than adequately describes disastrous.
And for all the blows life has handed me, for all the mistakes I have met and made, God has gone and blessed me with the most amazing of complex but lovable females.
And today, I am singing my women very high praises
The Sisterhood
I am the eldest child, and thereby an elder sister to two extremely nerve-wrecking, attire-stealing, jewelery-borrowing sisters. Martha& Linda are responsible for a major part of the madness that now resides in me. But they are also a major part of the joy and blessings that I have been bestowed with. Through nights of endless laughter spent reminiscing on our chaotic childhood, through tears, pain, anger and despair, and through prayers&hours-long phone conversations, it is clear to see why these women shall forever be little pieces of me that I continue to scream at, push into line but still love more than any other. It is not just blood that unites us. It is years of shared pain, trauma,joys, blessings that appeared at the very right time, dreams lost and recaptured...and childhood albums that show how far along we've come.
I Love My Sisters.
And even in the midst of questioning God's sense in the parent choices He made for us, I pause to give thanks. For my beautiful, strong, and sanity-testing sisters.
The taller one? Yup. My younger sister. Martha. |
The Gin And Cocktail Friend.
Tabitha.
This team does not have a whole load of members. Mostly one really, who left the country a few weeks back. But who has been with me through so many unsober nights. Tabitha's classic response to, "...I am not so good..." is usually, "Morie, you need a drink...."followed by a plan that most usually gets me to bar where we toss gin& tonic into my sorrowful self.
Tabitha was my University room mate. For one year, we watched "Friends," binged on" TV Chicken," and gave ample support to the gin industry. Two women society labeled crazy but who preferred the comfort of their room to any other place on the planet. When we were not blasting rock music from our top-floor room, we were reading Shakespeare's sonnets, plotting how we'd penetrate the diplomatic world and most of all, being friends. Sharing survival tales, reading Cosmo, and each making sure the other's world was firm and safe.
I love my room mate that turned out to be a great friend. When I am rich and famous, I promise we shall live out all our crazy dreams.
See you in Dubai.
The Bankers.
My first job was at a bank. I hated it. Not one drop of like for that job. Drained me, tested me and nearly took the life out of my dreams. Needless to say, I jumped ship. Yes, I met and made one of my greatest mistakes in that place. But not before I had met three women that to will forever remain the most beautiful treasures I took from there.
Peace;
My strength, my big sister, and one of my biggest models. To say I admire this woman would be an understatement. To say I learned and continue to learn a lot from her is partly true. I do not now anyone else that gentle or calm. Where I am screaming and blazing a trail of anger, she is calm, calm and calmer. Where I'll gladly tell you where to shove your bad attitude, she will smile and try again. And where I will walk out even on those I know I will not forget immediately, she will stay. And love on.
I wish I could be more like you, I wish I had the strength to not give up on love, I wish I saw the good in everyone like you do, and I wish I had a knack for numbers like you do. I am sorry I partly introduced you to alcohol, and I am sorry that sometimes, the bad clearly trounces the good. But I am glad we have one another.
Vanessa;
Straaaange...and stylish and Life House-loving. And wise. Yes, wise...not the book sort of stuff. Not the quote and lyrics sort of wisdom. But the learned, sometimes-the-hard-way, type. This woman is a lot like me. Stoic, sometimes annoyingly so. But I know that I like to be left alone some times so I leave her alone when I think life is making its rounds with her. Then I send a late-night text message...digging, but just on the surface. Then we riddle our way around the issue, go a bit into the heart of it...then seal off with stoic-but-real-feely promises to always be here for each other. And we always are. She is, at least.
Thank you for pushing me to the light...albeit it was closer to a shove. Thank you for not judging me at a time I was on the verge of hating myself...for understanding that I got weak, but making sure I didn't wallow too long.
Woman, you were partly the reason I was able to face the last major-ish storm in my life. Thank You.
NO HUG, PLEASE.
Isabel;
My dearest...I will tell you today that I think you are exceptionally strong and beautiful. And because you have not sent me an-intended-to-annoy-me email in a long time, I will be totally nice to you. I do not even know how you manage to get through some of life's not-so-wanted-but can't be-escaped-issues. That you do so standing tall& proud only makes me prouder to have you as a friend. Thank you for letting me give you a bit of advise, considering am still making my way around life. For silly but deep Face Book status updates, for wine and coke cocktails, and for trusting me enough to be vulnerable with me.
Happiness is on its way. I hear it has been asking for directions to you.
That we have managed to stay friends even when we do not have a common work mail system any more, and do not see one another as much is proof that some thing good always comes out of a bad situation. The bank drained a lot of the life out of me, but God went and sent these blessings my way.
For all the times I've never said it, I truly appreciate you.
The Listeners And The Long-Distance Loves.
Flower;
It is quite possible to have a successful long-distance relationship. With years of no communication, followed by a re-union across a social network that rekindles the relationship. The couple in question however has to have the strongest foundation of love possible. Louise and me are a powerful example that such relationships do work. Friends from 1993, school mates from 1993 to 2003, numerous semi-fights between us, but the bond holds as strong as ever. It could be because I have my eye on her elder brother that doesn't seem to notice I'm all grown up now...or it could be because love can be this true. And survive time differences, and years of almost no communication. It could be because first best friends are not that easily forgotten. I know that same town or not, ours is a friendship that will stand all the major tests.
With love from Peron; Kendrah. |
These are two of the noisiest, loudest and craziest women I have the fortune of knowing. I'm constantly wondering what they'd be like if they so much as sipped alcohol. They are mostly teetotalers but God,are they hyper! And the most social and friendly people I know. Peron listens to me rant..and rant...and laughs with me...and knows me well enough not to probe if I don't offer to tell. And she gave me my first and totally adorable God-daughter.
Immy...my love, my friend, who would tell stories all night if we didn't doze off on her and who manages to never keep time...but somehow keeps in touch even when oceans separate us.
Me, Ritah,Immy |
More praises to be sang later on....
morin waw....this is sooo sweet and so clever...
ReplyDeleteyou really are a jewel..
miss yu so much and will definetly see you in dubai..
keep up te good work here..
thank u hon. I miss u sooooo....
ReplyDeleteto us, and gin.
MoMO MY LOVE,
ReplyDeletenga my letters arnt turning pink..lol,bt ths is the greatest thing anyone can ever cme up wth...i misssssssssss u soooooooooo much my dia, this is so cool,tho ppple usually write thse wn thy are abt to die..lol am sure ur fine...to me ur a sister, a frend tht neva switches off ha fon or evn ignore my calls, wt dd i do to deserve...lv u lots n ur a Diamond my dia...time is really flyn to our Avantage wl be bk soon n ths tym will toss Gin n tonic bt please not...wn I gt high u may need to blaack out coz i seem to talk more....kisses
oooooh this is sweet. ps; you were nice. kisses. Isabel
ReplyDeleteeeh Lefty..I didnt know U could write this good...where have U been? More and more...im waiting keep it up gal and go all the way.......love Carole
ReplyDeleteThank u nyabo. More coming up.
ReplyDeleteNice read, considering I fluked gal-kaboozi. So when's the guys' turn?
ReplyDeleteThank u.In good time...
ReplyDeleteOMG...I SO HAVE TO SEND U A PIC OF THE RECENT MI...I HAVE CHANGED SOOOOOOOOOOOOO MCH SNCE THN MY SISTAOOOOO....bt Rita is so quiet....plus our ka foto wth yAZMINE SHD ALSO MK ITS WAY HEA...
ReplyDeleteawwww...moeeyyy doeyyy...i know that sounds lame but it's exactly what I was thinking after I read this! can't believe u r still crushing on Eugene thou...this was supposed to be about MOI!!! but what the heck, i love you Moe, more than I can i even begin to admit! I am so glad i met u back in 1993, n yes ours is forever...sealed at that moment when we were both crushing on Kalanda...:-) or was it sme 1 else, im not sure!
ReplyDeleteBTW, U look amazing!
wise??? Thanks babes....glad i cud be of help
ReplyDeleteyes Straaange. Wise.
ReplyDeleteI loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee this...ts soooooooo nyc! i c u-sori us,going 2 greater horizons..!!! :)
ReplyDeleteohhh....n btw,am still asking and shall 4evre ask cz like Linda says.."arent we entitledd"???? very nyc thou...!!
just had to read this amazing wonderful piece again..your such a dear friend morie..
ReplyDeletegive us more pieces to read..your talent is so special..
xxxxx